Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(541): View more from Oregon

its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.

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(210): View more from Texas

remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.

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(801): View more from Utah

let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.

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(410): View more from Maryland

we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier

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(562): View more from California

youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know

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(352): View more from Florida

He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!

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