Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
