i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize