she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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