And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Randomize
