Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
