Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
We are two peas in an std pod
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize
