Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize