yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
