So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize