I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
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