We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I wish there were birth control emojis
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
