the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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