just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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