You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
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