You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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