dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
You ruined the universe
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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