someone threw a dead crab at me
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
