when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
