You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
