David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
