chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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