"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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