This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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