I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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