It's just like the Real World with babies
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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