i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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