We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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