i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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