so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Randomize
