hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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