I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize