Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
