pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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