I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
