Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
