Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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