what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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