Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Randomize
