how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
