my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
