we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
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