He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
