Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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