So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
