Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Randomize
