in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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