Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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