4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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