K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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