so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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